My days filled with tears

I’ve done more crying over the last week or two than I have in many years, a reality that doesn’t worry me in the least, but, until very recently, it confused me because I couldn’t figure out why they hell I was crying. I don’t mind my emotional life experience. I do like to understand it. Especially since this recent stint of tearfalls began right after getting great news.

Watch, I’ll show you.

  • The Kahrmann Advocacy Coalition application for pro bono legal services filed with a group that will wed us to a top law firm has been accepted.  Good news. As a result, KAC is on its way to becoming a 501c3 nonprofit company. Very good news.
    • This means KAC will be able to file legal actions against some who are denying the rights of people with brain injury disabilities in New York State. Good news
    • It means we will be even more adept at uncovering and exposing various forms of corruption (which includes exposing those whose allegiance to the rights of individuals with brain injuries is lip service and lip service only). More good news.
    • It means we will be able to advocate for more people and in doing so, hopefully, make their lives a better place to be.  Really good news.
    • It means the waters will become more treacherous for those who oppress the rights of brain injury survivors, often by treating them as if they are nothing but revenue streams.  Very good news.

With all this good news, why the crying?

Let me again assure you I have no problems with the fact I’ve been crying a lot. No embarrassment and no worries that it means something has gone wrong with me. I know some have been convinced or have convinced themselves crying is an act of weakness. I would say to them, if crying is an act of weakness, why is it so hard for you to do it?

I want to understand, not avoid my my emotional experience in life. So, I reached out to my old therapist, an extraordinary man, Bill Buse. If anyone could help me track down the reason for my tears, he could. He did. I can’t tell my father and my mother. I can’t tell my family because I’ve not had an active family life since I was 16. That I can’t tell them drenches me in sadness.

And so, the tears. Now that I understand them, I am very grateful for them. Every one of them is testimony to the depth of my love for my parents, my sister, my family. Every single one of reflects how great it is that KAC will soon be a more powerful advocate than it already is. This would make my parents and my family very happy, and, if you’ll allow the “little boy” to peek out from behind his history, proud of me.

4 thoughts on “My days filled with tears

  1. Congratulations Peter! Two things, while I do agree with what your former therapist said to you, it could also be that they were tears of joy or relief because you finally accomplished a big and I assume long standing goal for yourself. As well your organization way want to help me with my goal. My goal is to create a system which could really begin to save Social Security and many disability services. This is my intended goal and my plan is to begin with helping those with TBI and then move to NHTD and then to other disabilities beyond that. Please contact me at your convenience at my email and I can explain my plan. I would have no problem telling you what my plan is, but I don’t want to post it online for public consumption until I’m much further along in the process. But I would like to discuss it fairly quickly because I just had an interview for an ILST position in Rochester. I’m fairly certain that I will be able to replicate the success I’ve been fortunate enough to achieve post injury in others and that is my plan, but with some others changes to the waiver, should it continue to exist and Social Security. But please email me and I can explain much more about it in a more private setting. But again congratulations, your accomplishment should be viewed as a win for all of the injured around the world. And hopefully as an inspiration to them all as well.

  2. I have experienced those tears too & it’s not always easily associated with extraordinarily good or bad news.

    I heartily congratulate you on your upcoming 501c3 designation.
    I would love to compare notes on how to accomplish that. I invested in a program that is supposed to walk me through step-by-step how to set it up but it’s like the directions for putting together a complicated airplane model: I was never any good at it.

    My hat is off to you for all you do on behalf of the brain-injury community.

  3. Any update on the waiver? I know a lot of service providers are losing their jobs in Rochester. Perhaps just an attempt to make more money while they know they still can. But isn’t that going against what’s best for the client?

    Sent from my iPhone



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