Category Archives: trump

Smerkle Grumpy Punchin’ Pumpkins!

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Note to reader: It has been some time since Smerkle Grumpy, an occasional “guest” here, has penned something for this page. However, his dislike of Trump has gotten him arrested three times. Something to do with pumpkins. Don’t ask me. I’ll let him explain.

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“Pumpkins. Keep me away from pumpkins. And I don’t mean those once a year Halloween jack-o’-lanterns that have some really cool faces carved into them by carving out parts so maybe you have this wild-eyed jack-o’-lantern looking at you, lit from inside by a candle. They really are a sight to behold.

Anyway, this is not about jack-o’-lanterns. This is about straight up uncooked sitting there on the aisle or farm or wherever the hell pumpkins like to sit, but mostly when I pass’m in the supermarket.

They have arrested me three times in markets because of Trump who’s as orange as it gets. I’m telling you, three times in the same fucking supermarket, I failed to quell the urge to punch out the first pumpkin in reach. Just three of’m. One punch each caves their chests in. Boom! Boom! Boom! Of course this doesn’t go over well with the supermarket manager.

There was a nice moment that really took me by surprise. When I was being arrested the third time, right before they were taking me out, I wasn’t in handcuffs. It was the same two cops as the first two times. There was no animosity in the air at all. It was just, no, you can’t destroy the store’s produce with repercussions. Anyway, that’s when this nice moment happened.

As I was leaving with the two officers the third time, the store manager came up to me and handed me a bag containing three pumpkin, smiled and said, “Three pumpkins for you to knock out. On us, Mr. Grumpy.” A gentleman truly, if ever one was born, that store manager”

~ Smerkle Grumpy ~

Joseph Goebbels would like Mark Meadows

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Mark Meadows

It occurred to me recently that Joseph Goebbels would like Mark Meadows. Meadows brings the same rabid dishonesty to what can accurately be called, Trump’s Propaganda, that Goebbels did for Adolf Hitler as the führer’s minister of propaganda from 1933 to 1945.

I remember the moment I first thought this. I felt my mind screech to a halt, thinking, “No, that can’t be right!” I didn’t accept this knee jerk reaction on its face. I thought about it some more, and I realized, the analogy fits, with scary perfection. More than eight million of my fellow Americans have the COVID-19 virus and we’re closing in on a quarter-million of us dead.

Today, I heard someone point out that twice as many Americans have died from this virus that died in World War I.  This rocked me. My grandfather, my Poppop, served in World War I. He was in the Army. In a field signal battalion that was part of the, justifiably famous, Rainbow Division. He suffered trench foot as a result of the mustard gas. He was hospitalized somewhere in France. Army doctors wanted to amputate his feet. Poppop essentially crawled out of the hospital and was taken in by French nuns who took care of him, and saved his feet.

Poppop is one of the blessed who survived the war. And now I hear that the number of us who have died from this virus is twice as many as those of us who died in World War I?

Yesterday, Trump’s minister of propaganda, Mark Meadows, said, “We can’t control the virus.” Meaning, let Americans keep dying until there is or his not herd immunity. That means two million dead Americans, at least. Yeah. I think I’m right. I’m sure of it. Joseph Goebbels would like Mark Meadows.

Congress & Shut The Fuck Up

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I’d like to be able to just go ahead and say, Shut the fuck up and not cause any trouble in the process. I mean no disrespect. That said, I write and say my own sentences, thank you very much, and it is not my fault that shut the fuck up is a phrase that can be very helpful on the emotion management front. One of my favorite lines in movies is in Midnight Run, when Robert De Niro’s character says to Charles Grodin’s character, I got two words for you. Shut the fuck up. A classic line, if ever there was one.

Shut the fuck up is a playful phrase with all kinds of fun potential. Just close your eyes (or not) and imagine yourself saying, Shut the fuck up to those you think might just benefit from the experience.

I’d pay good money to walk up to Trump and say, “Yo, orange boy, or whatever the fuck happened to you, shut the fuck up.”

I thank some members of Congress for helping me realize I’d best not to say, Shut the fuck up,  because it is, if these folks are any measure, an apparently deadly form of nuclear-weapon English. After all, members of Congress cower in fear when faced with schoolyard tweet or taunt from Trump. Lyin’ Ted scare the shit out of you, does it? Little Marco, freeze you in place?

To these brave congressional few I say, I’ve got two words for you, shut the fuck up.

President Donald J. Whiteman

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You cannot support President Donald J. Whiteman’s pro-child-abuse policy of tearing children (from babies to teens) away from their mothers and families and be American, at the same time.

Whiteman is a racist. Whiteman is a misogynist. Whiteman’s bigotry applies to pretty much everyone, save for those who are wealthy, white, and male. If the male is a dictator, Whiteman likes him no matter his skin color.

Whiteman represents, through actions and words, the side my father and uncle fought against in World War II; they were in the United States Army and fought against the Nazis.

We are in the same fight now. We are in the beginnings of it. Silence, is not an option,  if you love this country.

 

A memo to racist Donald Trump from a former NYC Cabby

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Donald Trump, you’re a racist and you’ve always been a racist. I drove a cab in New York City in the 1980s. As you know, the primary turf for yellow cabs is Manhattan. It is not unusual for a cabby  to be “invisible” to passengers immersed in conversation. So, let me say I heard enough conversations in the backseat to know you’re not only a racist, you’re a flat out misogynist pig and pretty much a crap business man.

Arguing over whether or not you’re not a racist is like arguing over whether or not Mount Everest is really a mountain.  First of all, I think the whole discussion about race and races needs to change There is one and only one race — the human race. Within the race you find different eye colors and skin colors and hair colors and somehow, the skin pigmentation part of the equation gets people like you all bent out of shape.

I was held up and shot by a teenager back in 1984. From time to time someone asks me what color and race the kid was, or they presume to already know. I never answer the question. Well, that’s not quite true. I do have a bit of fun with a stock reply of my own making when someone asks me what race the kid was.  I always say, “The human race, why?”

Now, you would like the world to belief you’re a tough guy. Someone not to be trifled with because you’re so big and tough. I think you’re a wimp, but I’ll give you a chance to show a little backbone. If I’ve got the backbone to say I am not a racist, then you should have the backbone to admit you are. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but at least the likes of Lester Maddox and Bull Connor and George Wallace openly acknowledged their racism. They were honest.

So go on, tough guy, have the guts to admit you’re a racist. Otherwise, the following observation still holds. Lester Maddox and Bull Connor and George Wallace had more integrity than you. Wrong and dangerous, just like you, absolutely — but honest.